Struggle City

Tuesday I spent all day at a grant writing seminar. It was a little less than fun but it was a nice change from being in the office all day. I wish I could say I thought it was worth the $199 spent to go.....but it really wasn't. I didn't learn much more than I already knew (and I'm no expert by any means). If anything, it got me somewhat "pumped" up to try and write the next one. But, as I looked around the room and learned where everyone worked, and talked with a few people during lunch I wondered- why is it I'm doing what I'm doing. And why do some people get to have a "better" job than me? At one point during the day I was "pumped" up to starting seeking a new job. I thought, if that girl can be the director of blah blah.....then so can I! but, then, at one point during the day I thought- I don't want to be a director, I want to be a mommy. Yes, I'm a mommy regardless of my job. But, I'm struggling with what I want to do in my professional world. Do I want to save the world? Or do I want to be a classroom Mom? Struggle City.